Thoughts around self belief, perfectionism and performing arts.
I’ve been thinking a lot recently about believing in ourselves and what that means to physical movement but also to our lives in general. I teach many students every week, and they are some of the hardest working people I know, both in their careers and in their free time. We’re talking working 60 hour weeks and still finding time to come take circus class. I’ve noticed that they’re also extremely hard on themselves both in their lives and in their circus practice. I think it’s getting worse the more we consume and share on social media. In the performing arts we’re always chasing perfection. The perfect line, the perfect inversion, the perfect 180 degree split, you name it and we want to make it absolutely flawless. There’s nothing like performing arts to attract and exacerbate perfectionism.
In my own practice I’ve found this to be counter productive, and sometimes quite damaging to my belief in myself and to my creativity. I’ve consciously moved away from looking too deeply at videos of myself before posting them to social media because no matter how good others think they are I will find a reason not to post them. It can be something as small as my foot not pointing quite as much as I know it can. Something that only I will notice or care about. We are our own worst critics. It can hold us back from everything we might achieve if we only allowed ourselves to be human.
You’ve probably heard the quote “to err is human; to forgive, divine” (Alexander Pope, An Essay on Criticism). I suggest that to achieve greatness in our movement practices, or divinity if you will, we must forgive ourselves for our own humanity. Especially if that humanity is holding us back from experiencing all that our bodies have to offer. Without those imperfections and mistakes we can’t grow or learn. Embracing those imperfections and mistakes can help us find new ways of moving and thinking. I can’t tell you how often I teach something and the first time a student tries it they apologise for not being able to do it. Why do we think we must be able to do something on our first try? What does that say about our mental state that we believe we must attain mastery with only one attempt?
I think a large shift in mindset is needed for the performing arts both recreationally and professionally. Imperfect needs to be embraced because it can be beautiful to see someone’s creative process. If we all refrain from posting things until they are perfect we contribute to the belief that only the perfect things are worthy of sharing. How much do we cheat ourselves out of connection, growth and life experience by not sharing our journeys?
I strive to think of my creative process as a form of Kintsugi, the Japanese art of repairing broken ceramics and porcelain with lacquer and gold. These ceramics become unique and beautiful works of art through the process of becoming imperfect. You could almost say that the imperfection is where the art lies. It’s where the art can grow and develop. I think this is also true of our movement arts. The imperfections are in fact the best part. Those imperfections are what makes you unique. They’re what makes you, you. That is the true beauty of your movement art.